Copyright 2009 Theresa Harvard Johnson
On Saturday morning as I drove to the GA VOC Meeting, a strong message of "being ashamed" began to pour through my spirit. The Lord began sharing with me that he has placed POWERFUL ministries on the inside of his people, but because they are ashamed of the boldness and forwardness of that message — they suppress it and hold back the very words they have been given. They, the Lord said to me, are ashamed of what he has placed on the inside of them. Is this you? Are you rising up out of this place now?
In its simplest form, the word "ashamed" simply means to be "embarrassed by." Embarrassment in and of itself is rooted in fear, and guess what, "FEAR IS OF THE DEVIL!" The scriptures are continously telling us, "DO NOT FEAR! DON'T BE AFRAID FOR GOD IS WITH YOU!" But for some reason, many are overcome by fear — so they withhold that "message" that will set them free, set others free, and move them into the next dimension of their ministry…. their very lives.
Let's take a closer look at "fear." It means to be afraid, to feel anxious, and to be afraid of. In the Greek, it means to suffer from cowardice or to be a coward. This is the definition of fear when used in 2 Timothy 1:7, which reads: The Lord has not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, and of love and a sound mind… In other words, the scripture is saying the Lord has not called us to be "COWARDS"… but to be powerful, operating in love, with a sound mind. Fear is the sign of an unstable mind or double-minded person. (That's another lesson though…)
So, to be "ASHAMED" of the message on the inside of you is to be EMBARRASSED by the Lord himself while FEARING what MAN will think…
I don't know about you but that thought within itself is quite SCARY! Many people would rather please and appease man, than stand up for the only TRUE AND LIVING GOD….
Let's make this personal to your ministry. Let's say the Lord gives you a prophetic teaching, a poem, a spoken word piece, a short story, etc. and tells you specificially, "Say it like this Theresa. Write it like this Theresa. Deliver it like this Theresa." But when I step myself up before the people, "I say it like I want to — leaving out the key words that he instructed me to put in it." Worse than that, I choose to share something ENTIRELY DIFFERENT from what he gave me because no one else is doing anything or saying anything like what he has given me.
How many of us have been OR are in this place of such strong compromise. We can take it further, but I just want you to get this picture in your mind of the message we are relaying to God when we are "embarrassed" by the message on the inside of us.
Truly, I've had people who follow this ministry look sick when they saw me approach the open mic. (Listen with your spirit to this…) They were afraid because they knew that the message I carried in my belly for other leaders and believers was generally going to be a correcting or instructional word that either exposed sin in the camp or brought warnings and correction from God. It didn't matter whether it was through poetry, spoken word or direct prophecy …. but I could see it in their eyes. They were AFRAID…. and it wasn't of me … it was a strong concern for what OTHERS might think. I even had folks to tell me as much to my face, and I was deeply hurt and troubled by it because, quite honestly, I didn't know how else to be or whatelse to do … because this was the "voice" assigned to me… from heaven.
For years I went into SHUT DOWN MODE…
I didn't want to offtend people so I'd contemplate whether or not to say Jesus. I'd leave off sections of poems because it hinted that homosexuality was wrong or talking about pimping preachers and pew prostitutes.
ONE DAY… ONE DAY… GOD CHASTISED ME!!!!! I won't go into it, but IT PUT THE RIGHT KIND OF FEAR INTO ME — the FEAR OF GOD — and not man. I haven't moved from that place since. Had I stayed in that state of compromise …. The Scribal Anointing, The Ministry of Voices of Christ … my ministry, family … we wouldn't be where we are today. The sound in me would never have reached a place of maturity. What's even more of a reality than this is God's word which says: "IF YOU ARE ASHAMED OF ME! I WILL BE ASHAMED OF YOU!"
Now, let's put this last statement in perspective. God is not saying he will be embarrassed by you here…. he IS SAYING that you will remove yourself from under his covering and protection. When you go out and "do what you do" or "you don't do what you are supposed to do," he will not be able to come to your rescue because in a very subtle way, you have rejected him…
Being "ashamed" causes one to RUN AWAY…. or attempt to HIDE from what they are ashamed of. If you are running away from the MESSAGE placed on the inside of you, then you are running away from GOD HIMSELF. How long do you think he will sit back and allow you to do that? I had to get myself in order when I was going through this … because I was sooooooo close to being cut-off from my destiny. Thank God I didn't linger in that place and justify my ridiculous behavior.
God knows how the message on the inside of you should be delivered — way better than you or anyone else around you does. If he sends you to someone's home to say, "Today, get you house in order or surely you're going to die," …. you wouldn't show up to their house and say, "Honey, I know you're going through some things … but you really need to set some things in order as soon as possible."
In one sense, you're given them the message, but in the second sense you've lost the seriousness, the urgency and the weight of that message. The people whom the Lord is sending you to may not HAVE another chance or a third or fourth opportunity. It is for this reason that God placed YOU in their path. You were not created to BE YOUR OWN VOICE … but to be the Voice of God..
Ephesians 6:19-21 says: And for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly, to make known the mystery of the gospel, For which I am an ambassador in bonds: that therein I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.
MY FAVORITE:
2 Corinthians 5:20 So we are Christ's ambassadors, God making His appeal as it were through us. We [as Christ's personal representatives] beg you for His sake to lay hold of the divine favor [now offered you] and be reconciled to God.
If we claim to write prophetically, then everything we write is an APPEAL from God to HIS PEOPLE TO BE RECONCILED… that is made through us. Think about this now. We are delivering messages DIRECTLY from God to His people. If this is true, then is God not able to protect you inthe midst of delivering that message? If you lose your life in the process of delivering that message, wouldn't it be worth it? If man turned his back on you while you are delivering that message would you be honored?
So, why then, are so many ashamed? We do what we do to fulfill Matthew 28:18-20 and everything done that supports Jesus' instructions to us. Everything else — is just … nothing in comparison. I tell you, It's Jesus or nothing for me…
